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The real unwritten rules of online dating - The experts tell
By Joe Markus
A recent survey indicated that over 40 million singles have used or
are currently using online dating services. It¡¯s a huge business
that has ushered in a whole new era of dating with its own unique
set of rules.
Of course you know about online dating safety and how to protect
yourself from unwanted attention. But do you know the unwritten
rules, the tips and tricks that will make your online dating
experience much better?
Keep Your Expectations Low
It has been estimated that 96% of the people who use online dating
services fail to find a compatible person with whom to have a dating
relationship. Part of the reason for this, though, is that most
people approach online matchmaking with unrealistic expectations.
When they don¡¯t find a perfect match after one or two dates they
give up and try something else.
Despite what the advertising wants you to believe, your perfect
match isn¡¯t going to just fall out of the sky one day. It takes
diligent searching, careful screening, and lots of dates to increase
your chances of success. Keep your expectations low key; don¡¯t set
yourself up for failure by getting too excited when you see an
interesting profile or meet an interesting person.
Don¡¯t Respond Too Quickly
Most online dating services won¡¯t tell you this because they make
money from email messages between members, but don¡¯t be too quick
to answer when a message comes in. Many online dating experts
suggest waiting 24 to 48 hours to respond, and also say never to
respond on a weekend or holiday. Their reasoning is that when you
respond too quickly it makes you appear desperate and also doesn¡¯t
allow you to pause and carefully compose an appropriate response.
Yes, it¡¯s exciting when someone notices your profile and makes
contact, but don¡¯t let the excitement run away with you. Relax,
take a deep breath, and if necessary refer back to the previous
section on maintaining realistic expectations.
Keep It Light
When you answer an email, keep the tone light and friendly. Online
messages are NOT an appropriate avenue for providing your entire
life history or unloading about your past hurts and current
emotional state. Don¡¯t be shallow and flip, of course, but do be
conservative with what you write. And, as always, don¡¯t reveal
personally identifiable information via online messages.
Don¡¯t Drag Things Along
Once you have exchanged a few messages, it¡¯s time to either meet in
person or move on. As a general rule of thumb, if more than three to
five messages have been exchanged and you haven¡¯t set up a date
yet, then it¡¯s time to say goodbye. Don¡¯t allow yourself to be
sucked into email communications that drag on for weeks or months at
a time. Email is not a substitute for meeting and getting acquainted
in person.
Tell The Truth
One of the great temptations of online personal ads is to embellish
the truth about you. Whether it¡¯s shaving a few years off your age,
overstating your career achievements, or understating your body
weight, remember that the truth will be revealed once you meet
someone in person. It¡¯s pointless to lie about such things and it
undermines trust right from the start. As Mark Twain once said ¨C
¡°When in doubt, tell the truth.¡±
About the Author
Adam and Drew's Dating Tips has a large variety of free articles that have been written by consulting 'experts' in the dating, flirting and relationship fields. Find out more at http://www.adamanddrew.com
Article Source: http://www.simplysearch4it.com/article/8162.html
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| Some other articles by Joe Markus | |
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