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The Attack On The Mail Order Brides Industry (Part Two)
By Jamie Morrow
"Are you at all embarrassed or ashamed about that?"
Amy I am very proud and happy in what I do. What is even more important is the happiness and joy I bring to the couples we bring together. It appears the only people who are not happy are people like you who enjoy intervening in other people's happiness. As I said to you before, you won't directly talk to these women because it would only corroborate what I have been telling you. They select men for marriage out of love for that man. You won't talk to the ones that have been married for 5 years, you won't talk to the ones that have been married for 10 years, and you won't talk to my Mom a foreign bride happily married to my dad for over 45 years. She raised five children and had a career working for one company for over 30 years. They now lead a life of world travel, family visits and volunteer work. No I do not think you will talk with such women. The thought of your false, shallow book-learned ideals being shattered by the realties of their happiness and real life perspective would be just too incongruent for your entrenched twisted views.
"You do realize that there is nothing about you as a person that would make anyone want to marry you, only things that you happen to possess by virtue of being lucky enough to be born in the U.S."
Amy I am a typical American man. My possessions are average and everything I possess came from hard work and endeavor. No woman's eyes are going to pop-out by looking at my possessions. I would have to say you are the lucky one Amy. Very few places in the world can a woman say such reckless and unsubstantiated believes as you have without consequences. But you live in the United States, so you can promote unproductive agendas and extol feminist myths with no consequences for the damage that entails from your deceptive messages. How lucky you are. But you know what; your misguided view does not penetrate my well-being. You are correct in calling me lucky. I often tell my beautiful wife Karina how lucky I am to have met her, and you know what Amy… she tells me the same thing.
"You are trying to get something you do not deserve: love, loyalty, respect, companionship."
Amy everything you have said is nothing more then an emotional diatribe you provide no content to your message. You are nothing more then a name caller. I can only imagine that if you had any physical strength you would also be a bully.
"News Flash: If you have to pay someone to be around you, then the relationship is not real."
I would agree. Why do you bring this up? The men do not pay for the woman and the women do not pay for the man.
"Accept the fact that you are a loser, doomed to be alone, or content yourself with finding another loser like yourself who may want to be with you."
Amy I am a happily married man living a fun life. Any objective person would be able to see your considerations are clouded with hate and bigotry. You hate the idea of American men having alternatives to American women, and you have a superiority complex and a prejudice towards foreign women. A confidant woman would not be threatened by competition, but it appears to scare you. You hide your fear under the guise that you care about these women to the point that you fabricate their condition and what is in their hearts. If anyone should be ashamed Amy, it is you.
"Lower your standards to what you can reasonably attain, and leave these poor, vulnerable women alone. I want to cry when I think of the horror these women face when they are stuck with losers like you."
I feel very sorry for you Amy. Your self-inflicted pain comes from a vision of terror that does not exist. I hope it is not too late for you to feel better about yourself. I invite you to answer all the questions I have asked, and by that I do not mean respond. I mean actually answer my questions, surprise me with an exchange void of glaring lies and insulting attacks. Can you raise yourself to those standards? If what you believe is true, you should have no difficulty in presenting a logical, rightful position. Now if you don't mind, I have to eat dinner, burned rice.
Jamie
Engage the Exotic – Mail Order Brides
"I would like to say that I am sorry for launching a personal attack on you, a total stranger. I have just heard so many horror stories about these kinds of things. But I did let my anger at these injustices get the better of me, and I should not have."
Amy apologizes for the personal attack; yet what injustice and horror stories is she referring to? It appears she is saying that foreign women from developing countries that marry American men are at risk. But she does not say what this risk is, why they are at risk, to what extent they are at risk or if the risk is any different than any American man or American woman would face being married. Amy does not factor in any evidence to justify her emotional outcry. Her anger is based on a false conclusion.
“That said, I do find your website extremely offensive and inflammatory in that you stereotype and degrade American women by saying that men can find "younger, more beautiful women than what is locally available" in Latin America.”
This fact does not degrade American women. It speaks of the competitive advantage that American men have internationally due to qualities that foreign women appreciate and are often not accustomed to from the local men. What I believe you find "offensive" is American men selecting a foreign wife that you consider to be of lower caliber than American women.
“That statement does not speak very highly of your customers - it also stereotypes them (as shallow)."
Why is it shallow to appreciate beauty and youth? You can claim beauty is superficial, but the reality is most of us want to be beautiful (women more so than men) and most men enjoy the company of beautiful looking women. If we want chocolate instead of broccoli you telling us that broccoli has more nutrition and substance than chocolate does not make us superficial for our selection of chocolate.
"It is ironic because you imply that American women place too much importance on money and personality, and then you appeal to the superficial and shallow aspects of your customers who are placing importance on age and physical appearance."
People do not consider youth and beauty as irrelevant as you do. At no time do I say this is all that men want and at no time does wanting a beautiful, young, foreign wife correlate to superficiality on their part. What you are doing is no different than calling someone shallow and superficial for playing paddle ball on the beach instead of chess in the den.
"Do these men seem any more noble than the American women (as you describe them) that they are trying to avoid?"
I never said these men are trying to "avoid" American women. I am pronouncing that they have other alternatives to American women, an extension of their search horizon.
“I understand that these are marketing tactics and you must appeal to your customers. But relationships are not trade negotiations, where one party says: "o.k., I am bringing X beauty points to the table and Y personality points, what does that buy me?""
Every relationship is an exchange, and yes a form of negotiations is taking place. They may be exchanging your love and support for my love and support or any of a variety of role designations. What each party brings to the table may not be directly negotiated, but an evaluation is taking place on how a potential partner attributes meets your desires and needs. Yet none of this has anything to do with a "buy" and this decision making process goes on whether we are aware of it or not and it is a good way of determining if both are a good fit for the relationship.
"You say an American version of your wife would not be interested in you. What exactly does that mean?"
I said she would not notice me. This means I would not catch the eye of an extremely beautiful American woman 18 years younger than me.
"What is an American "version" of your wife?"
The short answer is a top of the line woman with super model looks in the prime of her youth with a college education.
"How do you qualify that statement?"
I will quantify it for you a perfect 10.
"Does it mean that you are shallow and require a certain physical ideal woman whose arbitrary and fleeting beauty you desire?"
It means that I am normal and enjoy the beauty of attractive younger women. I don't expect the beauty of my wife to diminish in my eyes. Beauty is not "arbitrary" it is well defined in our society, but there is nothing wrong with an individuals arbitrary determination of beauty. While you like to throw out "shallow" I considered all the tangible and intangible qualities in the selection of my wife. If anyone is shallow maybe it is you. You appear to want to eliminate looks as a factor in choosing a partner because it is fleeting. You throw less into the mix than I do.
"So, how does that make you different from women who are after men for their money or power?"
I have no objections to such women. They can set their criteria in any manner they so choose. I provide an avenue for men to counter such women. I am not trying to restrict anyone's selection of a spouse as you appear to be.
"It just seems so cynical when people view relationships this way. To use a really silly example, it is kind of like the fictional relationships depicted on "reality" t.v. Joe Millionaire wants a woman who is beautiful (his shallow criteria) and the women are looking for money (their shallow criteria). [I gather from all the hoopla about it that the woman who won was not actually in it for money, but who cares.] Anyway, the premise was such that he would get his beautiful woman, but that when she finds out he is not rich she will want nothing to do with him. I suppose that the intention of shows like this is to stereotype women as gold-diggers and men as shallow people seeking trophy wives. This just seems so cynical and jaded to me. I bring this up because that is the overall impression I get when looking at websites such as yours."
I don't see the cynicism you see. International Introductions exudes positivism and hope for discovering a different variety of woman that may be more suited for some men and the compatibility of their relationship. It is not cynical for two adults to determine the content and means for forming a relationship. It appears that your cynicism derives from the viewer and not by what is being viewed.
"And I guess what I'm saying is that maybe there are gold-digging women and shallow men in the world."
Men seeking beautiful wives are not shallow. If Albert Einstein wanted an attractive, young, beautiful foreign wife by your definition he would be shallow.
"And maybe they deserve each other when they end up together, and they don't mind what their relationships are based upon. (I can't imagine that they would actually be happy, but hey). And I feel like the general message of your website is to take the man's portion of that shallow relationship and do away with it. As though you are saying: "Hey you! Want a gorgeous wife but don't have the money to attract one? We have the solution!""
Your belief that wanting a gorgeous, foreign wife makes you shallow is wrong. But even if we accept your conclusion what is wrong with that? If I only want to watch cartoons instead of "better" television programming and you consider this shallow, fine. What's this have to do with your involvement and concern between two adults and the relationship they choose to be in?
About the Author
Jamie Morrow is the owner of International Introductions http://International-Introductions.com a marriage agency specializing in Latin women. His expertise is in the mail order brides industry which has come under attack with pending legislation. He can be reached at: Jamie@Latin-Wife.com
Article Source: http://www.simplysearch4it.com/article/4363.html
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