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There's Something About Einstein
By Chad Koch
Albert Einstein
1. There's Something About Einstein
2. Einstein's Brain
3. Brainwash
4. Driving Mr. Albert
5. IQ
6. From E=MC2 To The X-Files
7. Albert Einstein Institution
8. Young Einstein
1. There's Something About Einstein
Bobby and Peter Farrelly, the brother writing-directing duo responsible for the comedy hits, "There's Something About Mary" and "Dumb and Dumber" are fans of the mad genius just like everybody else. To dazzle the crowds, Bobby Farrelly has taught his three-year-old son a few tricks to flaunt his own future genius. He's taught him 10 answers to some very advanced questions for a tot of his age, one of which is, "Who came up with the theory for E=MC2?" Playing the crowd with contemplation on his face, his son toes the ground with his sneaker and finally and timely answers, "Albert Einstein". Now that is genius.
2. Einstein's Brain
By chance a man named Thomas Harvey performed the autopsy on Einstein in 1955 shortly after the genius passed away. He wasn't scheduled to do so, the guy that was, wasn't able to make it. So, Mr. Harvey got the honors of handling Albert's most private matters, including his priceless grey matter. Without proper permission to do so, although Thomas attests to being given the nod of okay from an Einstein relative, Mr. Harvey pulled a modern day Robin Hood and snatched the scientist's brain. For decades he kept it in a secret location, dishing out pieces of it to researchers around the world. Mr. Harvey meant well, he intended to do elaborate research on the brain himself and have the findings published, but ultimately that endeavor never came to fruition.
3. Brainwash
The brain had seen better days, transformed from the greatest mind of a modern time to chicken-colored chunks floating in a smelly, yellow, formaldehyde broth, diced into varying bits and encased in Tupperware. A great deal of the time, the brain was hidden in a cookie jar at Mr. Harvey's girlfriend's house. Then one day, willing to make amends with the Einstein family, Mr. Harvey decided to return the long lost brain to Einstein's granddaughter, Evelyn in San Francisco.
4. Driving Mr. Albert
Enter journalist Paterniti hailing from Portland, Maine. Having written an article on Mr. Harvey and the missing brain, Paterniti's friendship with Harvey grew to the point where he was willing to drive Harvey and the brain from New Jersey to California, after all, it's not the destination, but the journey that counts. The unlikely trio - a freelance writer, an elderly pathologist and the Albert Einstein sans life and limb - traversed America in a borrowed Buick Skylark. Stopping here and there, visiting old friends of the two living members of the convoy. From an adobe ranch house south of Santa Fe, New Mexico to stay with old friends of Paterniti to the most unusual detour of the journey, to see William S. Burrough's in Lawrence, Kansas. As it turned out, Mr. Harvey and Mr. Burrough's knew one another and so, Einstein's brain had dinner with the author of "Naked Lunch".
5. IQ
The genius of Einstein was not only in his scientific theories, but also in his willingness for extreme self-promotion. Much of his early fame can be attributed to the fact that he went on a whirlwind world tour to promote his discoveries, dining with the rich and famous and powerful the world over. Gaining global headlines and firmly establishing the scientist as a superstar. Today, scientists like Brian Greene and Michio Kaku can only dream of such fanfare surrounding their groundbreaking work in search of the elusive Unifying Theory which Einstein himself spent his final days contemplating, to no avail.
6. From E=MC2 To The X-Files
Many actors have portrayed the wiry-haired genius on the silver screen. Most notably was Walter Matthau's witty turn as the mad scientist in the 1994 romantic comedy, "IQ". Australian comedian, Yahoo Serious took a hare-brained stab at in the farcical, "Young Einstein" in 1988. Even Robert Downey Jr. has portrayed him in the 1990 film, "That's Adequate". We here at T-Shirt King have voted and would enjoy seeing David Duchovny portray Mr. Einstein during his earlier years. Go figure.
7. Albert Einstein Institution
Having developed the means that led to creation of the world's most destructive weapon, The Albert Einstein Institution has been striving for new ways of nonviolent conflict resolution, just like Mr. Einstein himself endeavored to do while he was alive. The institution is committed to defending democratic freedoms and institutions - opposing oppression, dictatorship and genocide - reducing reliance on violence as an instrument of policy. For our sakes, it's too bad Mr. Einstein isn't still around these days.
8. Young Einstein
Einstein's popularity is legendary, you would be hard pressed to find anyone on the planet that had not heard of him. His very name is equated with genius. Despite his amazing feats later in his life, young Einstein didn't fair so well in the eyes of those around him. He was a horrible student, which he attributes to boredom, his teachers attribute it to an abrasive ego. His parents had concerns for him as well, because he couldn't speak fluently until his ninth birthday, leading his parents to suspect that he might be mentally challenged. Yeesh, what's a genius to do?
About the Author
To read more articles by Chad, please visit the American Pop Culture Encyclopedia at: http://www.americanpopcultureencyclopedia.com
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