Does a Fear of Rejection Have You Paralyzed?
By Royane Real
If you are always afraid of being rejected by others, you probably have a lot fewer friends and relationships than you want.
You are probably lonely much of the time, wondering how you can get the courage to approach others. You can learn to overcome your rejection fears and learn to make a lot more new friends!
If a fear of rejection is holding you back from forming new friendships or relationships, there is help available. You can learn to greatly overcome your shyness and your fear of being rejected.
Here is a brief summary of steps you can take to overcome your fear of rejection:
- Remind yourself why you want to overcome your fear of rejection. Remind yourself that your goal is to have a happy social life.
- Change what you say to yourself about rejection. Don't tie your self worth to whether or not you get accepted or rejected by other people.
- Take a series of baby steps when developing new relationships.
- Look for signs of receptiveness in the other person.
- Deliberately set out to collect as many rejections as you can. Make it a game.
- When you are out making approaches to other people, tell yourself that it's just practice, it doesn't count.
- Make many, many social approaches to other people.
- Give yourself lots of credit for being brave enough to keep on trying.
One way that you can lessen the likelihood and frequency of rejection is to allow your relationships to develop slowly. Take baby steps.
When relationships develop slowly, you must still make efforts to approach the other person, but your efforts will be low key and casual, rather than intense.
During each interaction with the person you wish to befriend, notice that person's body language and facial expressions. Are you getting encouraging smiles and nods? Is that person's body posture open or closed? Do you sense an eagerness to continue the conversation?
If the other person shows signs of enjoying your company and seems eager to continue your conversations, then he or she will probably be receptive to any overtures you make and any invitations you extend.
When you intensely fear rejection, you may arrange your whole life to avoid any situations that can trigger your terror.
If you actually confront the situations in which you feel anxious, your anxiety may lessen as you become more used to dealing with the feared event. By proving to yourself that you can face up to your fears, they will eventually lose their power over you.
About the Author
This article is by Royane Real, author of several self help books available at her website, including "How You Can Have All the Friends You Want – Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends" To increase your circle of friends, download it today at http://www.royanereal.com
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| Some other articles by Royane Real|
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